Speeches by Swayne.

“Nigeria is No. 7 on the world watchlist published by Open Doors. Some of the most egregious examples of persecution, with whole communities being laid waste, come from Plateau state. Many commentators, including the EU Parliament, have put that down to the pressures brought about by climate change. Well, climate change…”

“My interests are in the register, Mr Speaker. In what precise ways is the Minister intending to improve the decent homes standard?”

“Israel has forgone the opportunity to engage with two of its trenchant critics. Is this not a case of more fool it?”

“Tariffs are always and everywhere a diminution of the choice available to consumers. So it is not liberation day; it is the very antithesis. I hope the Secretary of State will bear that in mind as he considers the policy and the consultation on any retaliatory action.”

“I have always been particularly impressed by your brooch, Mr Speaker. Nevertheless, those increases are damaging for any enterprise, but we could make it up to them by restoring Baroness Kidron’s amendment to the Data (Use and Access) Bill. Will the Minister do that?”

“9. What recent assessment she has made of the potential impact of the planned increase in employer national insurance contributions on creative industries.”

“When I was the Minister responsible, the current Minister was then an outstanding official in the Department. He will therefore know that when I presented an egregious list of complaints to the Deputy Prime Minister of Israel, as well as to the chief negotiator, he simply stormed out of the meeting, leaving the ambassa…”

“When did weights and measures become metrology? Is this use of newspeak deliberate to cover an Orwellian attempt to cloak this huge grab for power, and to what end?”

“Will the Secretary of State give way? [Laughter.]”

“Has the Lady Chief Justice been rebuked for the impertinence of her letter to the Prime Minister following Prime Minister’s questions on 12 February, when he perfectly properly questioned another absurd judicial decision?”

“The analogy of the Chief Secretary to the Treasury has proved to be controversial, but the Minister agrees with the point he was making, does he not?”

“I have often found that the right of a councillor to insist that a matter goes to the planning committee, rather than be determined by officers, actually leads to the application going through where pettifogging officers would have refused it.”

“Despite a huge investment in our relationship with Israel over so many years, we appear to be reduced to the position of spectators on a touchline, shouting at the players and being largely ignored. To what extent does the Secretary of State believe that our lack of leverage—if any—is a consequence of policy decisions …”

“I call Perran Moon.”

“I have to impose a three-minute formal time limit.”

“Order. Interventions must be short.”

“I suggest five minutes for every speech to start with.”

“Before we begin, I point out that a British Sign Language interpretation of proceedings is available to watch on parliamentlive.tv. There are also British Sign Language interpreters in the room for the benefit of those watching from the Gallery. I appreciate that some Members will wish to use sign language during their…”

“Alas, the last Government did not take up my suggestion that the offenders be garrotted with their own intestines. The first problem, however, is to catch them. Is there any way that local authorities can be encouraged to take advantage of the collapse in price and improvement in quality of internet-connected cameras?”

“Because working is so beneficial to mental health, will the Secretary of State require claimants to undertake socially useful work in order to retain their benefits?”